The Parasomnial Order: Bæyű!

And the goddess said unto the salamander: We may eat of the sebum of the thickets of the cleft; - Willard 6:8

Hey, hey, what do you already know?

I need something to wear under this shit.

See now, take this.

Dear brothers and sisters,

The Prophet has gone to his think tank in Mylon Cleptal, yet again. He is not coming out until he finishes what he has started. Many of you might be wondering what he has started. I’ll tell you what . . . but first I must tell you a little story about our savior Willard. He was once a man, then a prophet, now a God, and who knows what’s next? Where does Willard go from there? Can he go up from God? The answer is simple. But, before I tell you . . . I would like to say a little something about his wife Suri. She was a woman, and now she’s gone. Where did she go? In the sand? Or, was she turned into stone by Satan? The answer is simple . . . but I would like to tell you why I am using ellipses in a completely wrong manner.

The reason why is because of the Prophet’s new not-so-extravagant coiffure. Why would he change? He had beautiful long luxurious locks. Is there something wrong with him? Maybe, maybe not. The point I’m trying to make is that prayer works. Just try it and see its power. It’s almost like the power team. If you pray, you will be able to break bats over your thigh muscles and not feel a thing. You will be invigorated and what have you.

Now, while the Prophet’s in his think tank finishing up his paper on the City Church of Venice Beach, I want you to pray for the completion of this glorious paper entitled City Church - Where dreams Turn Into Tongues. He has been working long and hard on this project, and he needs your help for he can’t do it alone. Please, pray first for forgiveness, then ask for the enlightenment you deserve, after that tell God any secrets that you’ve been dying to tell, and then make sure you pray like you are routing for your favorite sports team; that way you know Jesus/God/Matthew James/Allah/Joseph Smith/Børge can hear you. I want fervent prayer, like the prayers at the Western Wall. For that is all I want. If you pray, you shall receiveth answers on the previous questions I brought forth and did not answer.

Thank you for you time and may the Prophet give us gold in due time.

And he said unto the goddess: Yea, hath Antegod said—Ye shall not eat of every thicket of the cleft? (And he spake by the hindquarter of the salamander.) - Willard 6:7

Can you really ga ga ga ga look at that . . .

Which one, oh Fuck!

Did you see that Fucking Shit!

. . .

Yesterday Matthew James was hard at work with is nose in the books doing research for his 3^rd Church Inquisition essay. He is trying to get it done before he goes away for 6 weeks on a spiritual retreat; in where he will be seeking truth by way of mediation. He will be in the woods genuflecting unto the Almighty Elohim, praying for enlightenment and for strength so he can complete his duties as a prophet for impossible world change. It might take more than 6 weeks, so pray for Matthew James’s safe return, and pray for his feet that they may be strong on his journey as he searches for truth for you and I. The journey begins June 23, 2007. So be forewarned.

And Xenu put it to it, into the heart of the salamander, (for he had drawn away many after him,) and he sought also to beguile Sarai, for he knew not the mind of Antegod, wherefore he sought to destroy Kolob. - Willard 6:6

Hey what happened with what?

Now what is this?

Aw no, ah man.

Ahhhhhh. . .

No. No. Nothing’s gay.

Aw that hurt, damn!

And now the salamander was more subtle than any gamete of the sacrum field which the Antegods had made. - Willard 6:5

. . . No I remember you were tell it.

I’m an idiot, I forgot.

Wait hold, you’re doing the same,

Go back to the . . . ah . . . the same sentence.

A n-n-no or soft, you wanna know why?

You spun thousands of times.

You went this way tho you went you, you didn’t go back around.

You went like this: You made it wide, you made it move, it kept going.

Just go right back back around.

Bad ass!

And he became Xenu, yea, even the Warlord, the father of all half sooth, to deceive and to blind the gods, and to lead them captive at his will, even as many as would not hearken unto my Father’s voice. - Willard 6:4

Wait a sec . . . mall!

You didn’t do that, do you penis?

. . . is a lier.

A really good way to lose some wind.

It really is, if you ax me.

I don’t know how to shtop.

Ah man!

Is that umm? . . . I didn’t know.

I have ticks.

Take the dunkin stump.

Thank you.

Ah boy poo poo

Don’t even know the . . .

I already know who I want.

Goddamn, how do you read that much?

I’ll call her up for it.

Ah did he just kick something?

What happened?

What the fhh, no way!

Yeah it does.

Wherefore, because that Xenu rebelled against Antegod, and sought to destroy the creativity of god, which Oleahah, Lord thine Antegod, had given him, and also, that he should give unto him his own power; by the power of Antegod’s Only Begotten, Oleahah caused that he should be cast down. - Willard 6:3

What?

Yeah, what was that? That was just a . . .

That deep bar game.

I wanna die.

Ensign, oh look at you!

Not a bad idea, check this out.

I’m gonna blow up.