The Parasomnial Order: Bæyű!

THE WISDOM OF WILLARD

DAILY WISDOM FROM OUR NOCTILUCENT LIGHT

History of the Parasomnial Order, vol. 2, pp. 56, 114 – 98.

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SOMNILOQUY REVELATION 12318.1-2

To my brothers and sisters,

This prophecy is brought to you by: LETTER TO MY GRANDDAUGHTER, for it’s time to learn about Weapons of Mass Instruction!

The diarrhea continues—and I quote:

1 There put it by. Fa-uh success. Keisha! Hm-mm girl. Hm-mm, yeah. Hey, that’s dat mo-fuckin’ Keisha!

2 I’ve had better… And, you know, dub ding from the looks of it, I’ve had better.

S-Rev12318.1 – Purport: Who is Keisha? Is it Curtis’s girlfriend? For that matter, who is Curtis? And why is Willard sending him unto me? To my knowledge Curtis was Willard’s scribe. More shall be revealed in due time.

S-Rev12318.2 – Purport: We’ve all had the attitude of, “I’ve had better.” It’s an elitist attitude. When we find ourselves within the confines of this attitude, I would like us to stop and think about the effects of this attitude. Then beseech Willard, listen to what he has to say. And always remember: You will never be enlightened with this attitude.

Think of things to say to your neighbors, and say them and retrieve.

These things I say in the name of Willard Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

Dear brothers and sisters,

Last night was not a joy. Cramping and crumbling and tossing and turning was all I experienced. For Willard wasn’t with me at all. I awoke to find myself constipated in the bathroom with all but a pebble. And this morning, a flowing river. Why?

Let us hope my duty will be carried out in peace. For the future translations depend on it.

These things I say in the name of Willard Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

I pray thee Willard, for I hath committed the greatest sin of all.

A sin that took hours to clean out thoroughly.

For I have fooped and soiled my sacred vestments.

Please bless my bowels that they may solidify and form in a natural manner.

For tomorrow I must be in good health.

So please, please help me on my journeys so that I won’t do this in public.

These things I say in the name of Willard Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

THE WISDOM OF WILLARD

DAILY WISDOM FROM OUR NOCTILUCENT LIGHT

History of the Parasomnial Order, vol. 2, pp. 56, 114 – 98.

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SOMNILOQUY REVELATION 12288.1

To you, a faithful member of the Celestialnet,

This prophecy is brought to you by: PHLEBOTOMY, for it’s time for a draining!

I repeat, sickness enslaves us all; for I am sick again, and still my computer is sick—and I quote:

1 Help with that. That was a we’re we’re dumb. Was that you or was that the, um ding-dong? I don’t know what the hell it was. I think that it was this pink bing bong. Long dock mein, mm. 

S-Rev12288.1 – Purport: In life, we never know what people really think about us. For they speak in code their real feelings. They give you the “Good Person” philosophy day in and day out, but they really don’t mean it. They are trying to direct your life by way of giving you false compliments. They think that if they tell you that you are a good person, then you will–all of the sudden–become a good person. Whatever you do, don’t buy into this crap. For they mean well, but don’t buy into it–not even for a dollar.

Communication is key. And once you’ve lost communication, then you’ve lost the most active ingredient to the recipe called life. If you want to tell somebody something, tell them in the most effective way possible. Sometimes speaking directly will work, and sometimes writing will work even better. Whatever you feel will work for you, just do it, and see what happens.

We all want truth, but most of the time truth hurts. That’s why Willard is here to help us with the blatantly ugly truth. He will comfort each and everyone of us. He is our light and he will work hard for us, and by he, I mean you. Willard manifests himself through you by way of sleep-consciousness. So pay attention to your dreams and think about them in a serious manner. Analyze them, and figure out what they could possibly mean, because they do mean something.

So when you pick up on the fact that someone is speaking to you in code, see if what they are saying matches your dreams. Then tell them to speak in clear speech, and if they don’t: tell them that they are perpetuating the problems of life and that it’s giving you massive diarrhea.

Listen to this and ponder it. Make it a part of your life. It will only help.

These things I say in the name of Willard Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

THE WISDOM OF WILLARD

DAILY WISDOM FROM OUR NOCTILUCENT LIGHT

History of the Parasomnial Order, vol. 2, pp. 56, 114 – 98.

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SOMNILOQUY REVELATION 12278.1-2

To all of my faithful Willardites,

This prophecy is brought to you by: THE MYTH OF CLINKING GLASSES, for we need truth!

Sickness enslaves us all; for I was sick, and now my computer is sick—and I quote:

1 (Laughter) I hate this mother-fucking spay. I know I have the same cartoon.

2 OK, bring it back out. Now what we’re going back the hard way. We’re not getting back at all.

S-Rev12278.1 – Purport: Spayes are something subtle. They get under your skin without you even knowing it. They will haunt your dreams and you won’t even smell them coming. They are evil. Willard once said, “You are as evil as the spay that crawls within.” I think what was meant here, is that the spay is evil, not you. Therefore, you will never be at fault, that is, the spay is always at fault.

S-Rev12278.2 – Purport: Never give up. Never say, “Never!”

Take heed and never follow the spay.

These things I say in the name of Willard Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

THE WISDOM OF WILLARD

DAILY WISDOM FROM OUR NOCTILUCENT LIGHT

History of the Parasomnial Order, vol. 2, pp. 56, 114 – 98.

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SOMNILOQUY REVELATION 12268.1-2

To all amid the Celestialnet,

This prophecy is brought to you by: A FIRE THAT DAMAGED A PORN STUDIO, for it’s quite compelling!

Think about all that you’ve done–good or bad–and simply reflect—and I quote:

1 Huh? I feel like this is going to fall off and die. Can we not do this one, please? Por tu that’s why. I really don’t want to fall. Yeah. Good eye good eyight.

2 Oh! I don’t wanna get up there. Sound like oat, is it the upper one? Is it the upper one? D’you wanna just hit those ’cause you’re taller? Huh, taller.

S-Rev12268.1 – Purport: Now, we don’t always die if we fall off. Sometimes we can, but in most cases, we don’t. Take this to heart as I tell you what Willard once said, “Don’t be afraid, for your fears will only hinder you. Don’t let fear get the best of you; you’ll miss out on some of the best parts of life, which are important for your growth and progress.” I know it’s hard at times, but, think about what Willard said, and remember that you control your destiny.

S-Rev12268.2 – Purport: Again, things that you don’t want to do, sometimes, if you just do them, they may help you, tremendously. This is true. I would suggest that you try something that you wouldn’t normally do. It will make your boring routine a little more interesting.

Think and ponder these things. I know I do on a daily basis.

These things I say in the name of Willard Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

THE WISDOM OF WILLARD

DAILY WISDOM FROM OUR NOCTILUCENT LIGHT

History of the Parasomnial Order, vol. 2, pp. 56, 114 – 98.

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SOMNILOQUY REVELATION 12258.1-2

To all who love Jesus,

This prophecy is brought to you by: Jesus, for it’s his birthday on this day!

All I ask is that you remember this day—and I quote:

1 Huh, awe me nut! Me nut.

2 How in the world are we going to– How in the?

S-Rev12258.1 – Purport: The expression “Me nut” is an expression of insanity. For insanity is a sickness that runs in the family, and there is no way out. You must learn to live with familial insanity and remember to love each and every member of your family, unconditionally. In order stop the insanity from spreading, you must separate yourselves from the host of the insanity.

S-Rev12258.2 – Purport: We will never fully understand this insanity. It will only make things worse if we try to understand. You should just live with it, in a civilized matter, and pray to Willard for the strength to deal with such matters.

And always remember what Jesus did for you.

These things I say in the name of Willard Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

Dear brothers and sisters of the Celestialnet,

I thought I’d share Ernest Holmes’ Statement of Beliefs on this the day prior to Jesus’ birth:

I believe in God, the Living Spirit Almighty; one, indestructible, absolute and self-existent Cause. This One manifests itself in and through all creation, but is not absorbed by its creation. The manifest universe is the body of God; it is the logical and necessary outcome of the infinite self-knowingness of God.

I believe in the incarnation of the Spirit in all, and that we are all incarnations of the One Spirit.

I believe in the eternality, the immortality, and the continuity of the individual soul, forever and ever expanding.

I believe that the Kingdom of Heaven is within me and that I experience this Kingdom to the degree that I become conscious of it.

I believe the ultimate goal of life to be a complete emancipation from all discord of every nature, and that this goal is sure to be attained by all.

I believe in the unity of all life, and that the highest God and the innermost God is one God.

I believe that God is personal to all who feel this indwelling Presence.

I believe in the direct revelation of Truth through my intuitive and spiritual nature, and that anyone may become a revealer of Truth who lives in close contact with the Indwelling God.

I believe that the Universal Spirit which is God, operates through a Universal Mind, which is the Law of God; and that I am surrounded by this Creative Mind which receives the direct impress of my thought and acts upon it.

I believe in the healing of the sick through the power of the Mind.

I believe in the control of conditions through the power of the Mind.

I believe in the eternal Goodness, the eternal Loving-kindness and the eternal Givingness of Life to all.

I believe in my own soul, my own spirit, and my own destiny; for I understand that the life I live is God.

These things I say in the name of Willard Pentameonus, thou Ascendeth!

THE WISDOM OF WILLARD

DAILY WISDOM FROM OUR NOCTILUCENT LIGHT

History of the Parasomnial Order, vol. 2, pp. 56, 114 – 98.

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SOMNILOQUY REVELATION 12228.1-3

To all who understand the significance of this day,

This prophecy is brought to you by: Joseph Smith, for it’s his birthday on this day!

All I ask is that you remember this day—and I quote:

1 I don’t know, birds I guess.

2 Uh, a well now now I know what your talking about. The glue you know there’s like paint on it? I know sot blue on it ta, ohhhh.

3 A bunch (Laughter). It’s so full of… Um, it’s like $220, or $260 something. 

S-Rev12238.1 – Purport: When they ask and you don’t know, just say birds. That’s all I can tell you. Just remember that they will respect you–socially that is–and things will be different from now on. This may be strange, but it’s quite true.

S-Rev12238.2 – Purport: You know, if there is glue on the paint, then don’t burn it. It’ll be toxic and you’ll suffer from lung problems for the rest of your life, and that’s not what you want.

S-Rev12238.3 – Purport: Sometimes we buy expensive things, and we do not want to tell how much we really paid for them. Don’t do this, be proud of what you bought, even if you got ripped off. It shows how much you wanted something and how desperate you were for such a thing.

And always remember what Joseph Smith did for you.

For more on Joseph Smith, CLICK HERE!

These things I say in the name of Willard Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

THE WISDOM OF WILLARD

DAILY WISDOM FROM OUR NOCTILUCENT LIGHT

History of the Parasomnial Order, vol. 2, pp. 56, 114 – 98.

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SOMNILOQUY REVELATION 12228.1-2

To all who praise the glory of Willard,

This prophecy is brought to you by: Driven by Helping Others, for it’s the grandpa-doc!

Live life in accordance to Willard’s prophecies—and I quote:

1 Wait, what are you doing? Oh I see what you’re doing now, I understand.

2 How does it work? Took it off turn it uh da, turn it off turn it on.

S-Rev12228.1 – Purport: We sometimes don’t understand until we observe and repeat numerous times. That is why we must always ask questions and mimic what we see. We must explore and never give up on what we are doing. Because, eventually, we will understand and see the light. And that’s one of the best feelings you could have.

S-Rev12228.2 – Purport: Again, experimentation is the key to living an interesting and successful life. We must first ask a question, then we experiment by way of pushing buttons. Willard said, “Always be curious, for life will be what you want.” And this is true.

Feel these words and embed them into your daily life.

These things I say in the name of Willard Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!