Mentation Report #220: The Prophet Is Here Now!

November 2nd, 2009 by Prophet Matthew James

Dear brothers and sisters,

I am back from a two-month journey.

Checked Out

I saw many things, but couldn’t find what I was looking for. The curse is back, and now I must proceed w/ Willard’s work.

These things I say in the name of Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

Mentation Report #219: Two Months of Tnemyolp’me!

September 1st, 2009 by Prophet Matthew James

To those of you who manifest Willard through unconsciousness,

Labor day is an important day to all of us in America, for it is a day that most of us get off. And for me, that will be the day Willard Consciousness goes into hibernation. Lately my nightly reveries have been naught, for I’ve been watching too much TV, and Willard frowns upon that behavior. So if you are working on the holiday, make sure you don’t watch TV, because I know I won’t! Blessings to all.

These things I say in the name of Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

Mentation Report #218: Weeks Two & Three of Tnemyolp’me!

June 20th, 2009 by Prophet Matthew James

All Companions of Willard,

Behold, this was a silent fortnight!

Indeed.

Last night, Mahalalel’s spirit was witness, as the Son of James breathed.

Nothing manifested.

Hearken these words:

Bless those who live without Willard.

Bless those who know not of Pentameonus.

Bless those who seek where nothing shall be found.

For tomorrow is our only hope for prophecy.

Again. Observe. Repeat.

These things I say in the name of Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

Mentation Report #217: Week One of Tnemyolp’me!

June 6th, 2009 by Prophet Matthew James

To the Companions of Willard,

Due to the lifting of the Curse, I have been away from Willard’s Work for about a week. It will be like this for the rest of the summer. So be patient, for Willard has many glorious things in store for you.

Therefore tonight, (since it is the weekend) I shall prophesy many a wondrous things.

These things I say in the name of Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

Mentation Report #216: Only Nocturnal Mastication!

May 29th, 2009 by Prophet Matthew James

To the Companions of Willard,

Bless thee, for the Son of James spoke words of mastication. For prophecies were all but nothingness. Connection to Pentameonus was naught! Therefore, moreover, and furthermore, I’m in debt to Willard.

All those Willardites amid the Celestialnet put out thine hands and repeat after me:

Holiest thou, bring the Son of James to realization. This is now, and now will be lost. 

The manifestation is complete.

These things I say in the name of Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

Mentation Report #215: Mahalalel Be Free!

May 19th, 2009 by Prophet Matthew James

Dear brothers and sisters,

For a lot has been on my mind lately, and I feel I need a break. So tomorrow, I shall be away from the Celestialnet.

That is all.

These things I say in the name of Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

Mentation Report #214: Educational Ideal!

May 8th, 2009 by Prophet Matthew James

To the Otherly,

Last night’s prophecy was special. For once, a long time ago, I dreamed a dream where I read this statement–and I quote:

He’s inundated, the educational ideal. 

And so but then today, I prophesied this statement–and I quote:

Educational ideal.

What does it mean? We may never know. That is why we must keep Willard in our hearts and thoughts, because they fade away.

These things I say in the name of Pentameonus thou ascendeth!

Mentation Report #213: Willard Once Told Me…

May 2nd, 2009 by Prophet Matthew James

To the faithful in Willard,

Greetings and salutations to all.

Last night was a strange night filled with snakes and babies driving cars, but ironically,1 there were no prophecies. So, now, therefore, furthermore, and moreover, I’m going to share with you what Willard instructed me to do.

And I quote:

Matthew James, you are a beautiful man with long luxurious locks.  I’m sure you know this by now, but I felt telling you was the right thing to do. I’m speaking to you on behalf of the curse.2 For when the curse is lifted, I want you to give Mahalalel the Endurer a rest. For his circuits are old and brittle. The curse will be lifted sometime in the middle of May, so for now, be strong in your Somniloquy Revelations.

Nicely put, I thought. I’m sure I’m still going to be active, but I’m not going be as amazing as I once was.

Now take your hats off and pray with me.

These things I say in the name of Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

  1. Not to be confused with Alanis. []
  2. For those who do not know what the curse is, CLICK HERE! []

Mentation Report #212: A Fruitless Night in the BDCC!

April 18th, 2009 by Prophet Matthew James

To my brothers and sisters,

Willard did not speak to me last night; my dreams were completely nonexistent. As for today, that shall change. For I go on a Willard Quest to find myself. Actually, I go to find Willard, for his noctilucence is out there, and I am ready to breathe it all in.

Not much more to report.

These things I say in the name of Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

Mentation Report #211: Many a Dream!

April 11th, 2009 by Prophet Matthew James

Dear brothers and sisters,

I am back from yet another Willard Quest. The curse was lifted; now it’s back. Therefore, I shall have the time to write about my many haunted dreams.

There shall be more…

These things I say in the name of Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!