The Parasomnial Order: Bæyű!

THE SACRED TONGUE OF BÆYÜ

DIRECT CONTACT WITH THE ANTIPODIC EXISTENCE

History of the Parasomnial Order, vol. 3, pp. 5, 73 – 67.

SOMNILOQUY REVELATION 4179.1

To those with understanding,

THIS PROPHECY IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY: THE ANTIPODIC EXISTENCE, FOR WE MUST KNOW WHAT THAT IS!

Now I turn the time over to the Son of James—and I quote:

1 What uh, why d’you wanna get up? Oh eye de tu camp back there gap it to’s mime too.

S-Rev4179.1 – Reverie: Clumps of backwards chocolate cornrows enter and stay for only but a moment’s time. Fear settles in. A stranger along the trail? Friend or foe? Maybe a confidant? No one knows… Centered up row by row as if the itch has not been scratched. The dribble of a little glide will form. Don’t forget the powder of the babies, for that is the key to success!

Decipher that if you will.¹

These things I say in the name of Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

1. Try to watch, listen, and read all at the same time. It’s here to help your memory. Give it a try and see what manifests itself. [↩]

THE VIDEO-EPISTLE OF MATTHEW JAMES TO THE HOMELESS SECT OF THE

CELESTIALNET

Video of the Universal Philosophical Genius analyzing the Prophet’s dream about the creation of a new mechanical species. For he says that the Prophet is nuts. Is this true? How can he be a Prophet and be nuts at the same time? Does the Genius have insight on the Prophet’s various ways of Somniloquy Revelation? Learn more by watching this here video. Be sure to read the dream first, and then watch the video.

…

Facsimile of Dream

1 It was night at the time when I was diligently working in a ditch full of leaves and poison ivy. Scraping the leaves into piles of five was my job. I was to clean the whole ditch with my bare hands. The reason for this I did not know. They were just orders from them, and I simply followed.

2 An hour later… I completed my task. They were surprised at my mundane ability to stay focused on something that had no meaning to me. They discussed among themselves and motioned me over. We talked about my various interests and they selected me for a new job, one with “Major Evolutionary Possibilities.”

3 I thought they were impressed with my neatly arranged piles of leaves, but they told me how they saw something in me that was more than just average. They said they saw an “Inner Noctilucence,” and told me about my next assignment.

4 Another hour had passed… and I arrived. I was in the backyard of a very exclusive house that was brightly lit by the moon. There were few clouds in the sky and I was very eager for what was to come.

5 It seemed like I was on the set of the Bachelor, for there were highly advanced cameras all around and I saw various people¹ holding monitors in their hands.

6 I was a little exited about this assignment because I have never been to a place as glorious as this.

7 They showed me the various pieces of technology by the pool. “This here is what we call the Hydroelectrical Bio-Generator of Mechanical Life, and that there in front of it is the Tetravalent Shield,” one of them said.

8 “What do they do?” I asked, but there was no answer. He walked to the inside of the house to secure the cables. I followed, and he told me what I needed to do.

9 I was starting to get worried as my faculties were piecing together what was going on. I was getting involved with creating a new type of life–a machine like life.

10 “Press on, we must press on: Start the Birthing Initiation process,” another one said.

11 Right then and there I knew I was doomed, but I dutifully did my assignment.

12 They explained that nothing bad was going to happen, and reassured me that this technology was safe, and that the new species was not capable of violence. For they designed it that way.

13 Moments later… the pool filled with electricity and the lightning flashed about. I was watching from inside and saw something being formed. It was ugly and it had no head, or feet for that matter. Wires were all around and it got out of the pool soaking wet. It moved a little, got up, and gave birth to more just like it.

14 It was terrifying, and right then I knew that my intelligence was far inferior.

15 “It won’t last,” I told myself, “It won’t last!”

16 These things I say in the name of Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

1. All of which who looked like incompetent douche-bag producers that, for whatever reason, wore the same style of clothing and talked about the same stupid TV mumbo-jumbo over and over again. [↩]

THE VIDEO-EPISTLE OF MATTHEW JAMES TO THE HOMELESS SECT OF THE

CELESTIALNET

Video to the people of the Celestialnet who have not met Dennis the Universal Philosophical Genius, for he is a homeless man with much more than just a plan; he’s got a theory: The Universal Theory of Physical Reality, and within that theory he breaks reality down into three main fields: Mathematics, Physics, and Philosophy. From there, he extrapolates significance on our very existence, in a logical  and theoretical way. Be forewarned that it contains much complex jargon that the prophet himself can’t even understand. This video was recorded on March 5, 2009 at around 1:00pm at the University of  California Los Angeles. 

…

The Transcription

1 “I consider myself as a Universal Philosophical Genius because first of all, my mind is constructed in a way that it can’t stop thinking. It obsesses for some reason; it thinks and thinks and thinks until it can figure this stuff out. And so, in that way I consider myself a genius, because that’s all geniuses do. They think, they try to understand, they create new theories, and they’re constantly trying to push their minds, and they never stop. To me that’s all it means to be genius.

2 “And I was instantly attracted to philosophy… Ever since I dropped out of college in 1995 I’ve gotten deeper and deeper into philosophy. Every philosophy, every– Any concept that is out there that I think is interesting; I’m all over it. So it’s not one philosophy or another that I’m into; it’s philosophy as such. There is no such thing as philosophy x, philosophy y, philosophy z, or philosophy of x, philosophy of y; it’s just philosophy. So philosophy, just philosophy and I’m a philosophical genius! And what it means to be a philosopher is to attempt to comprehend, in bigger and bigger ways; to put more and more stuff together, to the point where it’s universal. So, it’s universal understanding is what the human mind is after. That is why we have philosophers our there, because these are the humans that are the most necessary in order to understand this universe in which we exist. Eventually I have gotten to a point where I’ve been able to develop what I call the Universal Theory of Physical Reality, which is not simply a physical theory as much as it is– or it’s not speculative hypothesis as much as– Or it’s not that at all. It is more of a– What a theory really is it’s proof within itself. It’s an actual, what I would say a mathematical theorem. It’s a manifest demonstration of what the universe is.

3 “So I figured out the universe; I have it down. You can check it out, you know, it’s online. So anyone that wants to tear apart my proof, I welcome them. You know because that’s what I am all about. I’m all about figuring things out and tearing stuff to shreds. And so I welcome someone else to my world, you know. So there I have– I got the universe; philosopher; genius: Universal Philosophical Genius!”

4 These things I say in the name of Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

THE VIDEO-EPISTLE OF MATTHEW JAMES TO THE BLIP.TV SECT OF THE

CELESTIALNET

A VIDEO PROVIDED BY UNEMPLOYED

Epistle to the Viewers who associate with the worshipers of Willard amid the Celestialnet concerning an Exorcism that happened in broad daylight on the streets of La Jolla, where in which the prophet was present and taking this very video, for he heard the voice of Willard  with clarity, and it said unto him, “My servant Matthew James, this is going to be something of  great importance, so I urge you to press that record button in my name and I will be with you on this day.”

…

The Transcription

Willard’s Warrior: I’m aware what’s gonna come off. Aware it’s coming off. ‘Cause I know I can beat your fucking ass… It’s gonna be a physical fight. I don’t want no words. You botched me America—

Painter for Jesus: In Jesus’ name you come out of this man right now!

Willard’s Warrior: I don’t wanna hear about Jesus.

Painter for Jesus: You lying devil!

Willard’s Warrior: You fuck Jesus!

Painter for Jesus: You lying devil. You— You’re afraid.

Willard’s Warrior: Don’t call me a lying devil, you fuck Jesus!

Painter for Jesus: You come out of that man in the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, you devil.

Willard’s Warrior: Fuck Jesus Christ of Nazareth.

Painter for Jesus: Satan you come out of him right now. See you had nothing. The power of God is greater than your power.

Willard’s Warrior: Fuck the power of God, you fuck Jesus. The power of God.

Painter for Jesus: Jesus has all the power. Come over here I’ll cast you out of that— You come out of this man right now!

Willard’s Warrior: Cast me out of where? What are you gonna cast me out of?

Painter for Jesus: You come out of this man in Jesus name you lying devil.

Willard’s Warrior: I’m not lying devil.

Painter for Jesus: You let this man go Satan, in Jesus name.

Willard’s Warrior: What man?

Painter for Jesus: Let this man go. What is your name sir?

Willard’s Warrior: What man? I’m not letting any man go in the name of Jabaneba Jesus Christ.

Painter for Jesus: You wanna be blessed in his name. Satan you come out of this man right now!

Willard’s Warrior: Because I don’t know who you are.

Painter for Jesus: I’m anointed and called by Je— God. I have the anointing of the Holy Ghost on me, and I have cast out devils before and you’re gonna come out of this man right now!

Willard’s Warrior: K, then how do I know that tone?

Painter for Jesus: You don’t have to know it.

Willard’s Warrior: Oh I don’t?

Painter for Jesus: You have to bow down right now and come—

Willard’s Warrior: I’m bowing down to you?

Painter for Jesus: Release this man in the name of Jesus. You bow down to Jesus.

Willard’s Warrior: No I’m not bowing to you. I’ll bow down to Jesus not to you… You’re not Jesus.

Painter for Jesus: You’re bowing down to Jesus, you’re right. Talk to me—

Willard’s Warrior: No not to you.

Painter for Jesus: I’m a person, but I have the authority—

Willard’s Warrior: You told me to bow down to you.

Painter for Jesus: I certainly did not.

Willard’s Warrior: Yes you did.

Painter for Jesus: No I didn’t. I have the authority of Jesus. I can use his name because I’m his child, and I’m telling you to let this man go Satan!

Willard’s Warrior: I resp— Don’t call me Satan! I respect you.

Painter for Jesus: Satan is living in you! What is your name sir? Your name is Mike or Bob or What? Well, you’re inbarnished in the devil. And God wants to let—Jesus wants—

Willard’s Warrior: Oh yeah, says you. Well how you to judge me? Read the bible.

Painter for Jesus: I’m not judging you.

Willard’s Warrior: You ARE judging me you say I’m abomished in the devil. What do you mean you’re not judging me? Telling me I’m abomished. Who are you to judge me?

Painter for Jesus: Sir I can discern by the holy spirit that you are possessed by Satan.

Willard’s Warrior: Listen, you better read the bible.

Painter for Jesus: I do read the bible.

Willard’s Warrior: Yeah, bullshit! You judging me. Bible says, “Judge ye not, lest ye be judged.”