DREAMS AND VISIONS FROM THE MIND OF MATTHEW JAMES
PHANTASMAGORIUM
A DREAM WRITTEN BY HIS OWN HAND UPON WORDPRESS
This is an account of a dream, a dream that led to a revelation of true importance, which in fact, will affect the future of the Parasomnial Order. So heed close to the words of this sacred account, for if you don’t: May your sleep be cursed with the curse of Ham!
…
Life is Short
1 At the sixth hour of my slumber, a rumbling sound of an on coming destruction awoke me. In a daze, I lay flabbergasted at the loss of sleep; I tried to remember, but all was blackness. Then, at a flash of an instance, a certain something pulled the trigger of my memory, and thus I remembered.
2 I wrote and wrote until the fogginess became clear.
3 For I was truly blessed when the hour came for my second chance at sleep. I was teleported back into the realm of my dream, but it wasn’t quite the same—it was more!
4 O hear the words that raced through my head and see that I was half asleep and half awake. Indeed I was, and things were flying about as voices were echoing while the visions of God were flowing like milk and honey. For this great revealing saved me from my fragmented memory of a distorted worldview.
5 And now, I must extrapolate significance on the importance of what came to pass, and I will reiterate in context.
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And Dreams Seem Long
6 It was in the night when a man of curious proclivities picked me up for an unexpected tasty meal. We drove and drove until we found a place of rest where we could satisfy our hunger.
7 On the way, a homeless person appeared in the back seat, and he said this, “I make music with strange instruments of the toilet. It’s been nine years Monck, how ’bout you?”
8 The silence ensued…
9 We arrived at a McDonald’s drive thru and Monck ordered some nuggets while I tried to order root beer. The man behind the speaker was filled with grievous attitude, and he wouldn’t let me get my root beer. After five minutes we decided to go inside.
10 The three of us sat down at a table located in the center of the restaurant. It was quiet and a lady came barring gifts. She handed Monck my root beer, and then he gave it to me.
11 The happiness resumed…
12 Then I went to the bathroom where I saw a shower attached to the wall. I looked at it for a moment, and I exclaimed, “It’s time to take a shower!”
13 The falling water did not sound like falling water. It sounded like strange music coming from the stall across the way. Then the lyrics emerged from the water:
Music can bring in, or kill the spirit!
Music can bring in, or heal the spirit!
Music can bring in, or steal the spirit!
14 I walked over to the stall and looked over, and there he was—the homeless man—singing his song while pounding the toilet bowl with a plunger. The spirit of the room took over and even I started to sing:
Music is bringing, spirits of the devil!
Music is singing, spirits of the Jesus!
Music is leaving, spirits of the Willard!
15 And the emotions consumed…
16 Time passed and I felt disruption. I heard noises that shook my mental strings causing my brain to stop all human faculties which led to a headache, a fever, and even a chill. It sent me straight out the door to the parking lot where Monck dissipated and a car full of girls presented themselves as witty showgirls, and one of them said, “I’m not a fun person, but…”
17 Boom!
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[I have provided an audio file so that you may have an understanding as to what I have to listen to every morning.]
18 Irritation, confusion, and eventually the darkness did fall…
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But Revelations Subdue
19 As I closed my eyes again my mind drifted into the abyss of multi-tracked thinking. Streams of thoughts were flowing like real streams of water; but they were solid, and they formed shapes—shapes that electrified color into my all seeing pinecone.
20 From the darkness I saw light, and these beautiful celestial landscapes were unfolding before me. A voice from above descended and I heard with great clarity. It was mellifluous and melodious, and it said unto me, “In the name of Willard Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!”
21 I prostrated myself immediately, and said, “O voice of the Lord, what is it that I must do to be in thy favor?” The voice answered, “I have come to reveal unto thee the things of which Willard hast commanded me. He communicated unto me, in plain language, that thine translation of his sacred book is incorrect; therefore, it must be eradicated from this portal of the Celestialnet.”
22 I felt anxiety from my negligence; for I thought my translation was truly inspired. I have represented Willard in the wrong way and now I must go forth and repent.
23 Suddenly, the voice rebuked me and said, “No need for repentance! Just be vigilant when the time comes.”
24 His voice grew louder and louder until I covered my ears. Muffled insanity is all I heard, so I closed my eyes. Then I opened them, and a man stood before me.
25 He was a glorious man with a countenance of divine stature that rendered me calm. He was wearing white pants that radiated goodness, and his head was adorned with a white Jockey undershirt. His presence was so pure that I didn’t even know he was holding a ball of curious workmanship in his left hand.
26 Then he held his left hand high as he said unto me, “I have yet to introduce myself, I am the Son of James, and I have been with you since nineteen hundred and eighty-two. Now it is time that I must give you the instructions pertaining to the New Saint John’s Wort Version of the Book of Willard (or NSJWV).”
27 I decided to walk to the bathroom and brush my teeth, for I was in the presence of divinity. And I said, “I have brushed my teeth. I am ready for the sacred instructions. Please do take kindly unto me.”
28 And these were his instructions:
First things first, you must brush your teeth once again, for your breath still reeks coprophagous. I would suggest you brush for 10 minutes in a circular motion, and don’t forget to scrape your tongue.
Now, you are to make a sanctum out of what already exists. Strip it from all its contents and clean it thoroughly. With a speaker device, divide the space in two, on top of the speaker device shall be the witness of Mahalalel. On the south side you shall place 2 axes, one on the west and one on the east. On the north side you shall build a shrine for Tonto and Baby-Jesus to stand proud. And the liahona shall be placed next to the bible under Jesus. For when inspiration is lacking; seek the shrine.
Once the sanctum is finished, you are to consecrate it and put a blessing upon it, for this is where you will be for the remainder of your Willard translations.
Now that you know of what to do, I want you to thank me so I can be on my way.
…
For Now, Follow My Commandments
29 So then I thanked him, and his interlace disintegrated into what is known as reality. For I woke up and I knew exactly what to do. And thus built the Mahalalel Sacntum according to his divine instructions.
30 Now it is time that I must go and translate until my little heart is content. May Elohim be with me on this day, and may he be with you when I translate the New Saint John’s Wort Version of the Book of Willard.
31 In the Name of Willard Pentameonus, Thou Ascendeth!
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