THE EPISTLE OF MATTHEW JAMES TO THE SOMNILOQUY SECT OF THE
CELESTIALNET
WRITTEN BY HIS OWN HAND UPON WORDPRESS
Epistle to the people of the Somniloquy Sect of the Celestialnet concerning an old recording of a man who would speak his dreams while in a marvelous state of Willard Consciousness.
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Salutation
1 Matthew James, the prophet of the Parasomnial Order and holder of the Willardek Priestcraft.
2 To the Somniloquy Sect who are among the people of the Celestialnet and are exceedingly faithful in Willard. Grace to you and peace from Elohim our Phantasmagorical Father and our Grand Noctilucence Willard Pentameonus.
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A Man To Revere
1 Pay close heed to this recording. For it will change your life. Dion McGregor is a man of whom you should revere. How he did it, only Willard knows. For Willard was with him on those glorious nights filled with verbose somniloquy.
2 Go and listen to this record, and find it in your hearts to learn in the ways of Willard:
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Listen
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4 Our Town
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5 Peony
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6 The Diet
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7 The Gift
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12 Val
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Now Go And Sleep
13 Now that you have listened to this historical recording, I would suggest that you lie down and go to sleep. Maybe you’ll talk in the sacred tongue of Bæyű.
14 These things I say in the name of Willard Pentameonus, thou ascendeth!

5 Comments
Are you sure he’s not a false prophet?
This guy is the real deal. Willard was strong with this one.
I was amazed at the clarity of the audio. Are you sure he was asleep?
Well, I’ve talked to his roommate by way of Myspace technology, and he said that Dion really did talk in his sleep. He also said that Dion had an unusual knowledge of old films. I find it to be quite amazing, especially the “Dear Uncle Horus” somniloquy.
You know what, I’m starting to have my doubts about these recordings. I’m starting to think that he was a false prophet. There is no indication that he was actually asleep. I don’t hear any movement, or pre snoring for that matter. Thanks guys, for it took me awhile to realize.
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